The wedding plans are off for now, and I assure you, niether of us are happy with it. Particularly not Jesse. I've made some terrible mistakes, and unfortunately I've been making those mistakes with the one person in my life that matters most to me. My fear of her hurting herself drove me absolutely insane to the point where whenever she got in one of her "low moods", I'd try anything and everything to bring her back up. Not such a big deal, until I'm making my proposal earlier than I'd planned, and agreeing to a wedding date I have doubts of being able to make. Those kinds of things NEED to come from ME alone, not a desire to do so but a drive because of fear.
I feel terrible about all of this, but the damage, it seems, has already been done, and I can't seem to do anything to make ammends for it. It really hurts me to see her so down, and every effort I make to console her is just in vain.
I felt that it's my place to announce this to anyone who might have heard about it on here, as I'm sure it's embarassing for her to tell others that her wedding has been postponed.
ID:9303
 Feb 27 2006, 6:12 pm (Edited on Mar 8 2006, 6:06 am)
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Feb 27 2006, 6:16 pm
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Artemio
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:( Best of luck to you both.
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Aw, I'm sorry. =( I hope things all work out in the end for both of you.
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Ah, man I hope things work out. You both seemed perfect for eachother.
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<3
if you need to chat, James is always here for you | |
Heh, it'll be fine.
Your situation sounds very similar to my own. What you need to do is give her some space, not talk for a few days, etc. Then work things out when you have both had time to cool down. | |
Awww. :( Well, on the bright side I guess it's better to have it cancelled rather than going through with an impulse decision of that magnitude.
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Yes I agree with your actions. Your fear of her hurting herself and her depressions have caused you to make a early move that could have ruined your marriage later on.
Has she gone to a doctor and talked to them? Perhaps her condition could be medical. I had a friend who was bi-polar, and when he was in a slump he was ready to kill himself, which was like every other day. Its best to give her some alone time, but try and stay in contact from time to time to let her know your there. Hopefully she is actully understanding of this. If she can't understand why this all happened.. Well she needs more help then I thought. Best of luck in the future, I hope it works out. | |
Well, if things are meant to be, then it will happen in due time (of course, don't let that fool you into thinking I mean you both can just slack off... relationships obviously require effort to work)... The act of marriage isn't quite as important as it is made out to be... Two people can be "married" without actually going through the ceremony, or vice versa...
Marriage is more about the commitment, and less about the ceremonial way in which we show that commitment... So as long as the commitment is there, marriage isn't a necessity (and if the commitment isn't there, then marriage is meaningless) And from the limited view we've gotten into your relationship, it certainly looks like there's a strong commitment (traveling hundreds of miles to be together, taking drastic measures to make sure she's happy, etc. are pretty good indicators that this means more to you than just some fling) Of course, marriage might not be a necessity, but it is still a life-changing event which shouldn't be rushed into, so you can't be blamed for putting it on hold... So, basically, postponing the marriage shouldn't hurt anything in the big picture... It might be a disappointment to a girl who (like most girls) has always dreamed of her "big day", but hopefully she'll be able to gather up her patience and get over that... I'm sure you've told her that your decision to not get married just yet is not due to some flaw in your relationship, or how much you care for her, but just that you aren't ready... Of course, she's likely to think those things regardless, but as long as you can make her see that you're not going anywhere and that marriage is really still an option for when the time is right, hopefully she'll come around... Best of luck to you both! | |
DerDragon, I'am really sorry whats going on with your life man. I hope it gets better and you two get married and live happy ever after.
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I feel sorry for both of you.
But really, things have occured, people can make mistakes, it's over. Spend more time with her, the downness will die soon enough, so everything will return to how it was. Untill everything is back-to-normal, don't talk about the wedding, don't continuesly apoligize, just try to forget it. Whenever you feel ready for a wedding, plan a date for it. Good luck to both of you. | |
Don't you love how everyone seemed to turn into a marriage expert because of this post?
Well good luck to the both of you. | |
that sucks
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How about...
Our wedding isn't ''postponed''. It's been cancelled. Erron said it's ''off''. And we have absolutely no plans for a wedding now, let alone at a later date. There is no wedding. | |