Warning: This post is full of whine
When things go wrong for me, they generally do so all at once. So when I got an SMS from an ex-fling that I hadn't spoken to in a few months, about needing to see me urgently, I mentally prepared myself for "Bad Stuff". However, I didn't expect this much.
Summary of the last week, culminating in the worst New Year's eve I've ever had:
1) Girlfriend and I broke up. Over the phone.
2) Ex-fling is 27 weeks pregnant. With my child (DNA test still pending, but it almost certainly is mine). Despite being on the pill, and taking them properly. What are the odds of that? About 1 in 100,000 or so. This presents somewhat of a problem, beyond the obvious fact that I'm 19 and not exactly in the best situation to be a father to a child. I wasn't speaking to ex-fling, because she happens to be a compulsive liar and ended up screwing my life up pretty bad back then. So getting into a relationship with her, in order to take care of the child, is not an option at all. Which leaves giving the child up for adoption, or getting an illegal abortion performed.
3) Come New Years day, a friend called and told me that the party we were going to attend is cancelled. Apparently the girl hosting the party is also a compulsive liar, and lied about owning a 500m2 house - Leaving 50 people with no place to eat dinner, and 150 people without a party, mere hours before.
4) Due to various circumstances, I was sitting in a train, alone, and annoyed, at midnight new years eve.
5) After coming home, I found out I was burning up with a fever, and am now lying in bed with a mixture of a very, very bad hangover and a semi-serious fever climbing up to critical levels. My throat is burning, because the food I ate during dinner decided not to stay in my stomache, and I'm constantly nautious and have a very painful headache, despite being drugged up on painkillers.
Life 1 - Me 0
Jan 1 2008, 8:51 am
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Kunark
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Wow, I thought my holiday was bad. At least it wasn't riddled with pregnancy :X
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Sorry to hear that..
I hope everything somehow goes your way, and that everything gets worked out. Happy New Year. | |
Just crank up some death metal, it always makes me feel better.
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Well, I'm hoping you get some sort of miracle from the DNA test. As much as it sucks, at least she eventually told you.
If it makes you feel any better my New Years blew as well. Nothing compared to yours, but still pretty crappy. Stinking hot. Lame party. And in one of the most embarrassing events of my life I had an unrelated panic attack while going down on a girl who, until that point, I was really connecting with. There's no 'I really like you, that whole freaking out thing was about pressure at work/school and had nothing to do with you' card (it's too specific). So that whole thing is ruined. I'm just glad I can forget about it and get on with my life. | |
It could be worse, you could be Nadrew.
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Did she happen to take any antibiotics while on the pill? I think Bactrim makes birth control less effective.
Either way, that sucks. Any chance of working things out with ex fling? | |
Nah, Ebon - She wasn't on anti-biotics.
As for working things out with her; we can talk just fine. However, even if she were the last female alive, I would still not enter into a relationship with her. If it were any other way, I would seriously consider it for the benefit of the child. | |
That is rough.
Some questions to consider: Is 27 weeks too late for a termination? What about in nearby states? Is it an option she is even considering? Why has she waited so long to inform you or pursue termination of she doesn't intend to carry to full term? Be careful: in many states a father can be ordered to start making support payments regardless of his actual employment status (it builds up arrears!). In my state, for example, the Attorney General's office aggressively pursues such actions and can garnish wages (which are not normally garnishable under out state constitution!) and even seek jail time for delinquency in payment! | |
Well, I'm in Europe. In Denmark, you aren't allowed to terminate past week 8/9. In England, its week 24. So she's too late virtually anywhere. She can get it done illegally (for something like $2000), but she doesn't want to do that.
As for why she waited: She fed me a story about not knowing, but it doesn't matter either way. I don't trust much of anything she says. As for being forced to provide child support - We weren't in any kind of relationship. I already checked up on this. If I was enough of an ass, I could just say, 'Screw you' and never talk to her again, or pay any kind of child support. Laws here about child support aren't as strict as they are in the US. | |
Alathon wrote:
Well, I'm in Europe. In Denmark, you aren't allowed to terminate past week 8/9. In England, its week 24. So she's too late virtually anywhere. She can get it done illegally (for something like $2000), but she doesn't want to do that. Not to say, "lucky," but our child support system screws people over all the time. A friend of mine has accumulated a massive debt because, as Jmurph pointed out, child support payments accumulate even if you are unemployed. He has, and may still have, a warrant for this. | |