The English Language
"If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? So one moose, 2 meese? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends, but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? Is it and odd, or an end?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? In what language do recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the complete lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which, an alarm goes off by going on."
I just thought I should share this with everyone! Its an exerpt from "The Bulldog" a joke paper you can pick up a store near here. Its quite amazing.
ID:184750
 Jul 14 2006, 5:56 am
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I saw that a long time ago. A friend's English teacher passed out papers with that printed on them to the class.
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I just found out that the plural of Fish is now Fishes. When I was growing up, Fish plural was Fish... Why do they do this to me?!
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Actually, I just looked it up and Fish and Fishes are both considered proper plural forms.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/fish | |
Oo Argh...when I was brought up, fishes,sheeps, and other things where considered incorrect...and now they are? That would explain why I can't pass English classes...
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--Vito